i still got it!

last saturday i joined the pointe class in HC.  it has been exactly 7 years since i last wore pointe shoes.  though i gained an awful lot of weight, i know my legs and feet are still strong to handle pointe work.  not being mayabang but i just know it. :D

7 years ago, i last wore Vaganova 4 XX H.  thats a size 4, width 2 (realy narrow and tapered toe box) with a hard shank.   i used to be the only one in QCB to wear grishko's back then since they were really hard and noisy.

now 7 years after, last july, i went around the limited dance stores in manila and couldn't find the perfect shoe for me.  most of the store attendants were unhelpful.  and i was looking for Russian Class entrada or pollete but of course, it wasn't available here.

so i settled for Grishko 2007 5 XXXX M.  when i fit it in the studio, they fit perfectly on my feet.  a little too wide on the box compared to what i was used to dance with, but hey, the shank felt good.  and it molded to my feet right away.  but oh my god, did my feet really grow in 7 years.  i guess its true what they say that after you give birth you size up on your shoe size after.  i got the Medium shank since i thought i won't be able to break the Hard right.

well i underestimated my feet thats for sure.  i broke my shoe quickly.  i could roll my feet to demi pointe easily.  either the 2007 model is too soft  or my feet are still hard as rocks!

pointe class was good.  i felt at first that i might not be able to dance at all and was quite intimidated by the kids (I'm literally 18years older than them.  i was already dancing as a soloist before they even knew how to say "ballet").  but as it turned out, i got the kids applauding me with my pique turns and everything else.  i still got it!

i can't wait for the next pointe class.  i think though that my shoes will die on me easily.  give it another 4hours of class and its dead for sure.

im so proud of myself.  even with the weight gain, i can still carry myself.  not with the same ease as before but still.  oh and i took double back to back classes that day.  i had to stop on the 2nd class' barre glisse' exercise though because i felt like i was gonna faint.  i was too dehydrated!  i drank half a gatorade bottle and got back pretty quickly for rond de jambe atere exercise.  :)

i hope i get my groove back on in time for may.  if maya plisetskaya can dance on pointes til she was 61, i believe i can go back and dance my way back to my first love.  :)

I've been analyzing my body for the longest time and i know if i can just lose these fatties i know i can go back to my dancing prime.  i recently saw a prima ballerina who still refused to retire on stage, even though she gave herself numerous retirement performances already and my god did the whole audience feel sorry for her as she just can't go up on pointe anymore on some releves no matter how hard she tried.  i had to explain to my husband "she was really super good some 10 or 15years ago when she performed this pas de deux.  ill show you on youtube!"

there really is a time when you know you can't do it anymore and you just have to let it go.  but i can't let it go yet.  my feet still can handle it.  i just have to get back in shape and build my stamina.  i know i still got a good 10years ahead of me if i do this right.  not necessarily go back to performing on stage, but just dance for the love of it.  :)