everyone said i lost weight, except the weighing scale. for 1 year i was dreaming of looking good onstage, technically and aeshetically. i may nothave trimmed down in size, but everyone said i was still good and as if nothing changed in my dancing.
it was an adventure indeed. i risked of getting fired at work for leaving early and things out of place all the time. my husband and i couldnt agree on a suitable schedule on weekends, bec we dont have a stable babysitter. i was short for cash towards the end because of all the cab i took to and fro every night. my kids longed to see me so instead they wrestle me in their half awake state at the wee nights...
theres all this drama shit in the studio.
but despite all those, being back on stage lit something inside me. after i abruptly quit in 2005, i longed for the performances and late night rehearsals, but silently. as i became a mother, i was secretly wishing my daughter to continue the ballet i loved my whole life and dance the roles i dreamed but never performed. i was dancing in my head day and night for the past 8 years. no exag.
and the show may be over, but i swear on my dead toe nails, that i will dance again.
its just a lot more complicated being a mom, working, and all that. give me time, ill figure it out. 8 years was long enough not to plie and grand jete.
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